Ep 223 : Living without judging you.

I like to try things on.

How about you?

When I was 6 and 7, my mom would drop me at Montessori school. In that big open room, we were to choose what we would play at. But before I did, I would walk around and check out what everyone was playing at. After some minutes, I would finally choose.

Watching everyone else's work was 100% more fascinating to me than doing my own. It was my downfall in Grade 4, when I went to public school and had to stay in my seat. I just... couldn't.

Now, I can stay in my seat. Choosing what work to do and where to go (when I let myself be me) is easy.

But lately, asking others to come with me feels vulnerable. What if it's wrong? What if they don't like it? What if they don't want to go?

Even as I type I can feel a familiar "fear" creeping up through my body. And in the next breath, I remember the tools and know that underneath fear is potency.

I am, at my base, a tender explorer who wants to know more about everything and wants everyone to come along. I have a naive belief in the interesting nature of my own discoveries.

But, I can see how, over the years, I have given up my own excitement when others couldn't see the same. And I can see how I've been looking to be something that more people will choose.

Which is where I've been looking at self-commitment. Committing to myself. My choices. My directions. Embodying them. Being proud of them.

I have to be honest:

I haven't been 100% proud of my choices recently. Even though I can do all the things I've been putting out, they've felt piece-y. Thin.

I couldn't have gotten here without those choices. But, choice always creates awareness.

There's a deep rich current of me still present. When I tap in (and I am now - hi 👋🏻) the only thing I care about is greater awareness and greater freedom.

My ultimate goal (if I had one) is that everyone see how great they are. Which of course requires me to see myself and be as great as I am.

Today, I am inviting you to what is natural to me: a deep exploration of the tools of consciousness. They alone empower us lead ourselves forward from right where we are.

Into greater awareness and freedom. Into more of ourselves.

For more of this, head over to http://infinitebeingschool.com/


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