I suppose I'm maybe going through a mid-life crisis of sorts.

I have tears streaming down my face.

I just watched this: 

I don't know what's going on with me lately.

I feel like I'm pulling away from the champagne bubbles of all the traveling and drinking prosecco and the jet-setting I was doing.

There is a huge gratitude I have right now for being home.

And since I've been home, there's been Standing Rock, and now Aleppo... and I've been faced with some really big questions.

I walked around this morning wondering what it was I truly wanted to create with my life.

With my willingness to let all the travel go temporarily, I wondered what else I could choose that I'd never considered.

My freshest thoughts being I could go to Aleppo, I thought!  I could be a volunteer!

I could go to the refugee camps and run Bars and help coordinate aid.

And as I sit here writing this, with tears streaming, I'm destroying and uncreating everywhere I've been the war-monger.  Everywhere...