I walked out of my condo today, earbuds in and swelled up with gratitude and ✨ ✨ of it all.
I used to play in the worship band at my very cool, movie-theatre church.
And lately that energy and desire to be in it and create more of it in the world has been taking me over.
I've been blaring the Modern Worship channel on Google Play Music like it's oxygen.
And so with "just be loved" playing deep into my ears and the tears rising in my eyes, I realized that this was what I wanted to tell you today.
That right in the fray and chaos of everything changing... right in the middle of the unknown and the uncomfort of everything you are that you have no idea how to be yet...
...that you are still surrounded.
As I was standing at the elevator feeling this flash of "I'm so alone," I instantly asked who it belonged to... and got this sweeping sense of all of it. Not mine. And totally present.
"Just be loved", playing in my ears, I realized that at any moment we can crumble to the ground and give in to that feeling.
That "alone" of choosing beyond anything you've ever chosen before.
We can cry for how hard it is.
And I have!!! SO many times.
But in that flash by the elevator where I almost chose that, and then looked around my life at all the crazy beautiful people who have.my.back., I gave in.
All of this gratitude flooded through me and the tears were of a different sort.
Even when they're not physically present, the people in my world flood through me.
When I put my attention on them, the molecules of the entire universe swirl in and around me.
What are you surrounded by? What care and nurturing planet is sitting there underneath you feet? What warm dog breath is right there to steam up your fingers? What mane can your hands get tangled in?
And just be loved, the song said.
Ok, says me.
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